STARBUCKS’ pumpkin spice latte, embargoed until Thursday (Starbucks).

This week there’s a hugely important event, which I am sure most Americans are closely following.

Oh … did you think I was referring to the nominating convention of one of the major political parties, officially naming the people who may be the next President and Vice President of the United States?

Well, my apologies. I was referring to the fact that Starbucks will begin offering its hugely popular pumpkin spice lattes on Thursday, Aug. 22.

America’s colors maybe red, white and blue. but for the remainder of 2024 we will be seeing the orange-ish hues of autumn everywhere, and the pumpkin spice flavors in nearly every consumable grocery item you can think of.

Composed of cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger and cloves, it can be mixed into (or on top of) lots of stuff. I’m not even sure there’s any pumpkin in there, which – frankly – would be a plus to me.

And that’s just the opening wedge of “Augtober.” We shall soon have Pumpkin Spice Slurpees at 7-11, pumpkin spiced donuts and yogurt, pumpkin soup and pumpkin pasta.

The impulse may also lead to some larceny.  Between now and Thursday, you know they’ve got the ingredients back there in the Starbucks … why be coy and make us wait? And the thought creeps in … how much would I have to give you, dear barrista, to make me a bootleg latte?  Is there a speakeasy somewhere in town where I can get my fix before Aug. 22, and after Dec. 31?

It’s tough times for the legions of spice-heads, a group which probably includes … you.